Sex positivity is the idea that we should embrace and celebrate consensual sexual expression and exploration without shame or stigma. At its core, it's about recognising that sexuality is a natural, healthy part of being human, not something to be hidden away, apologised for, or treated as dirty. In this article, we'll break down what sex positivity actually means, where the sex positivity movement came from, what it isn't, and why it matters more than ever.
What is sex positivity?
Sex positivity advocates for the normalisation and celebration of consensual sexual expression and exploration. It recognises that sexual desires, preferences and identities are diverse and complex, and that there's no one right way to be sexual.
Being sex positive means holding a judgement-free attitude towards all things sexual. It's built on the idea that sex is pleasure-based, not just for procreation, and it doesn't demonise sex or make anyone feel guilty for their desires and urges. Sex positivity puts a real emphasis on sex education, open communication and enthusiastic consent, because those are the foundations that make sex actually feel good, safe and fulfilling for everyone involved.
It also goes beyond the bedroom. Sex positivity acknowledges the social and cultural factors that create sexual shame and stigma in the first place, things like sexism, homophobia, transphobia and racism, and actively works to challenge and dismantle those systems. The end goal is a world where people can express their sexual desires and identities without fear of judgement or discrimination.
Being sex positive, in practice, looks like a constant, ongoing process of unlearning: noticing where society has taught you to feel shame about your own sexuality, and gently working through it. It also means not "yucking someone else's yum" just because something isn't your thing.
Where did the sex positivity movement come from?
Sex positivity isn't a new trend, even if it feels like it's having a moment on social media right now. The term has roots stretching back over a century, gaining real momentum through the sexual liberation movements of the 1960s and 70s, and again through sex positive feminism in the 1980s, which pushed back against the idea that female sexuality needed to be controlled, hidden or gatekept.
Today, the sex positivity movement is less about one single ideology and more about an umbrella of values: consent, bodily autonomy, education, inclusivity and pleasure for everyone, regardless of gender, orientation, relationship style or experience level. That's exactly what we're building here at Cliterally The Best.
What sex positivity isn't
There are a lot of myths floating around about what being sex positive actually involves, so let's clear a few up.
Being sex positive doesn't mean you're kinky AF (although you absolutely can be). It doesn't mean you need to have loads of sex, any sex, or even any interest in sex at all. You can have never had sex in your life and still be completely sex positive.
It also doesn't mean pushing sex onto anyone else. Being sex positive is about respecting and understanding that every body has different preferences, and that none of those preferences make someone more or less valid. Whether that's abstaining entirely, being in a monogamous relationship, or exploring ethical non-monogamy and swinging, sex positivity respects that we're all different humans with different needs, and that all of it is okay.
In short: sex positivity is about freedom of choice, not a checklist of things you're supposed to be doing.
Why is sex positivity important?
Sex positivity matters because it challenges and transforms the negative attitudes and beliefs that so many of us have absorbed about sexuality, often without even realising it. It helps build a culture of acceptance, respect and celebration around diverse sexual experiences and identities, rather than one built on shame.
There's also a strong evidence base behind the "education" part of sex positivity specifically. The World Health Organisation highlights comprehensive sexuality education as a key factor in helping people build healthier relationships, understand consent, and make informed decisions about their own bodies, rather than relying on guesswork, myths or whatever they picked up from the internet. Shame-free, accurate information consistently leads to better outcomes than silence ever does.
By promoting sex positivity, we reduce the shame, guilt and judgement that so often gets tangled up with sexual expression and exploration. We create space for people to express their sexual desires and identities without fear of discrimination or persecution, and that has knock-on effects on mental health, self-esteem and relationship satisfaction too.
How to practice sex positivity in everyday life
Sex positivity isn't just a mindset, it's something you can actively practise. A few ways to bring it into your day-to-day:
Talk about sex like it's normal, because it is. Whether that's with a partner, a friend, or your own inner monologue, ditch the euphemisms and shame-tinged language where you can.
Educate yourself, and keep doing it. Bodies, pleasure and identity are all things you can keep learning about your whole life, there's no finish line.
Practise consent as an ongoing conversation, not a one-time box to tick, in every kind of relationship.
Check your own judgements. If you catch yourself side-eyeing someone else's preferences, kinks, relationship style or lack of interest in sex altogether, that's worth sitting with.
Support sex positive spaces, brands and educators (hi) that are doing the work to normalise these conversations.
None of this needs to be perfect or all-at-once. Sex positivity is a practice, not a personality trait you either have or don't.
A message from Evie (Founder of Cliterally The Best)
I want you to know that although I bang on about sex online A LOT, it doesn't mean you SHOULD be doing these things, and if you don't, it doesn't mean you're not "liberated." It's that, if you do enjoy sex, that's completely natural, and you're deserving of these experiences regardless of who you are. 💜
