2025 update message from us: “The UK has recently (2025) banned choking being depicted in porn. This legal change highlights growing concerns about how extreme acts are normalised without context around consent, safety, or the performers’ wellbeing.
The irony is glaring: at the same time as introducing porn bans, the government continues to cut funding for sex education and relationship education in schools. Rather than empowering young people with critical media literacy skills (teaching them to question what they see, understand consent, and recognise the difference between fantasy and reality) we’re left with shame-based policies that drive these conversations underground. True harm reduction comes not from hiding content, but from equipping people with the knowledge and confidence to make informed, consensual choices about their own bodies and desires.
At Cliterally The Best, our stance is clear: education over prohibition. Banning content doesn’t make dangerous practices disappear, it simply pushes them further into the shadows where misinformation thrives and people are left without the resources to keep themselves safe. When we lead with education, open dialogue, and accessible information, we give people the tools to engage critically with what they consume and the power to make safe, consensual choices. Shame and censorship have never protected anyone; knowledge and empowerment do.“
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Please note, the information provided in this blog is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice.
Choking, or “breath play,” can be an intriguing part of some people’s sexual experiences, but it’s important to understand the significant risks involved.
According to a poll we conducted on Instagram, over 60% of respondents have experimented with choking in the bedroom at least once.
While exploring sexual desires is natural, this act can be extremely dangerous if not done with great care and attention. It’s essential to approach choking with caution. While the act might seem alluring, it can lead to serious health consequences if performed incorrectly. Many individuals experiment with choking without fully understanding the mechanics, which can result in serious harm.
This guide has been created to help those curious about breath play do so in the safest way possible – without judgment, shame, or condemnation – but with a firm emphasis on protecting your and your partner’s well-being.
The Risks of Choking: Why Safety is Key
Choking restricts airflow to the brain, which can cause a lack of oxygen, leading to unconsciousness, brain damage, or even death in extreme cases. Studies show that improper choking or airway obstruction can reduce blood flow to the brain, causing serious health complications. It’s crucial to recognise that breath play will never be 100% safe, even when executed with caution. However, with proper technique, clear communication, ongoing consent, and safety measures, the risks can be reduced.
Pornography and the Rise of Choking
In recent years, the portrayal of choking in mainstream pornography has contributed to the rise of breath play in many sexual relationships. While porn is a form of entertainment and can offer fantasy and exploration, it’s essential to remember that what is depicted in adult films does not always reflect the realities of safe practice. Porn often distorts the safety dynamics around activities like choking, and as a result, many individuals may try to replicate these acts without understanding the inherent risks.
Choking, Power, and the Normalisation of Harm
Alongside the rise in choking, we’re seeing a broader cultural shift towards increasingly harmful sexual scripts, where fear, discomfort, or loss of control are eroticised without sufficient attention to consent, power, or safety. In mainstream depictions (particularly within heterosexual contexts) choking is most often shown as something done to women by men, frequently without negotiation or aftercare, and framed as a routine part of sex rather than a consensual kink.
While people of all genders and sexualities engage in breath play, the way it is normalised in heterosexual porn and dating culture often mirrors wider gendered power imbalances, where dominance is prioritised and checking in is absent. This can create pressure, especially for younger or less experienced partners, to accept acts they haven’t actively chosen. When extreme practices become expected rather than discussed, they stop being expressions of desire and start becoming assumptions.
This isn’t about condemning consensual kink or pathologising sexual exploration. It’s about recognising how cultural narratives shape whose bodies are put at risk, whose pleasure is centred, and whose safety is deprioritised. Education, media literacy, and explicit conversations about consent are essential if we want sexual exploration to be truly consensual, affirming, and safe for everyone.
Safety First: Key Guidelines for Choking
If you decide to engage in breath play, ensure that safety is your priority. Here are essential safety tips to consider:
- Always ask for consent. Never assume that choking is something your partner wants or is comfortable with. Even if you’ve done it before, check in each time to confirm it’s still desired.
- Avoid applying pressure to the front of the neck. Pressing on the throat can lead to serious damage. Focus on the sides of the neck where the carotid arteries are, which are less vulnerable.
- Establish a ‘safe word’ or gesture. Ensure your partner has a way to signal if they feel uncomfortable or need to stop immediately.
- Constantly monitor your partner. Make eye contact and stay aware of their body language. This helps you gauge how they’re feeling and allows for immediate action if something feels off.
- Never use forceful pressure. Start with light pressure and gradually increase it only if your partner is comfortable and requests it.
- Use the palm of your hand. This helps avoid damaging the windpipe and ensures even pressure.
- Do not twist the neck. Avoid side-to-side motion, as this can lead to spinal injury or strain.
- Limit choking to rare occasions. Over time, regular choking can cause harm to the throat and neck. Keep this act occasional to minimise long-term risks.
- Keep communication open. Always make sure your partner is comfortable and willing to stop if necessary. Consent should be continuous.
How to Choke as Safely as Possible
If you choose to engage in choking, it’s crucial to understand the mechanics and approach it carefully. Here’s how to minimise risks:
- Focus on the carotid artery, located on the sides of the neck just below the jawline.
- Apply gentle, pulsing pressure instead of sustained pressure to allow for intermittent breathing.
- Avoid leaning into the choke with your body weight, as the neck is not built to support that pressure.
Why Do People Like Choking?
Some people are drawn to breath play because of the psychological effects. During choking, the brain is temporarily deprived of oxygen, which can induce a semi-hallucinogenic state. Dr. Giuseppe Aragona explains that this oxygen deprivation can create a feeling of euphoria as the body recovers and oxygen is restored, releasing dopamine and serotonin.
While the rush may feel pleasurable, it’s important to recognise that the risks involved in choking far outweigh the fleeting high. Always prioritise safety over sensation, as the potential for injury is very real.
The Bottom Line: Prioritise Safety and Consent
Choking can be a part of consensual sexual expression, but it should never be taken lightly. As we’ve outlined, breath play can lead to life-threatening consequences if not performed with proper knowledge and care. It’s essential to create a space of open communication, trust, and ongoing consent with your partner. Don’t feel pressured to try choking or any other sexual activity simply because it’s portrayed in pornography. Your safety should always come first.
If you are uncertain, consider exploring other ways to connect and build trust with your partner that do not involve the inherent risks of choking. Always prioritise each other’s physical, mental, and emotional well-being.
