LGBTQ+ Safer Sex Guide

LGBTQ+ Safer Sex Guide

Evie Plumb ·

Let’s face it, the queer community has always been forgotten when it comes to Sex Ed. Most sex education classes, assume that those receiving the information are both heterosexual and cisgender.

People will express their gender and sexuality in different ways and will use their bodies in different ways. There might be some stuff in this guide that is not relevant to you, but there is a little something for everyone!

So how can you keep safe when it comes to queer sex?

Penis To Penis

Barrier Methods

Condoms are your best friend (well everyones). Putting condoms on your penis during anal and oral & on your sex toys will protect you from most STIs including HIV.

When putting your mouth near any butthole the best way to protect yourself and your partner(s) from STIs are Dental Dams. These are flexible sheets of latex (basically a square condom) that goes over the anus when giving rim jobs which protect you both from STIs. These can sometimes be hard to find, so checkout my DIY Dental Dam video.

HIV

Regular HIV testing (every 6 months) will keep you and your partner(s) safe. Another great thing to incorporate into your routine is PrEP. This is a tablet that has recently become available on the NHS which you take daily to stop you getting HIV. There is also a tablet you can take after unprotected sex called PEP – find out more here. Condoms should still be used on this though as it doesn’t protect you from other STIs.

Vulva To Vulva

Barrier Methods

Sharing sex toys can be a common but often overlooked way to spread STIs. Putting a condom over these and washing them thoroughly after every use can help eliminate that risk.  Avoid double dipping and if you do try to change condoms.

When going down on someone, whether its the butthole or vulva the best way to protect yourself and your partner(s) from STIs are Dental Dams. These are flexible sheets of latex (basically a square condom) that goes over the vulva or anus when performing oral which protect you both from STIs. These can sometimes be hard to find and costly, so checkout my DIY Dental Dam video.

HIV

Anyone can get HIV,  although its not as common its still super important to protect yourself. Make sure you get your regular testing (every 6 months or after a new partner/unprotected sex)  – even If you’re in a relationship.

Penis & Vulva To All Genders

Whether you are Bi, Pan, Poly etc the same rules apply as the above two. Make sure you keep up with your regular STI testing (every 6 months or after a new partner/unprotected sex) and for those vulvas that have sex with penises and vulvas don’t forget about contraception!

Whether you are Bi, Pan, Poly etc the same rules apply as the above two. Make sure you keep up with your regular STI testing (every 6 months or after a new partner/unprotected sex) and for those vulvas that have sex with penises and vulvas don’t forget about contraception!

Common FAQs

- If I tell my doctor that I am lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, or queer, will he or she tell my parents?

Short answer, No.

In the UK, Sexual health services (contraception and pregnancy advice, or tests for STIs, including HIV) are free and confidential.

If you’re 13 to 16, you have the same rights to confidentiality as an adult (over 16) and the doctor, nurse or pharmacist won’t tell your parents, or anyone else, anything about you or your health unless you are at risk of harm.

- I’m worried that I might have been exposed to HIV. what should I do?

If you are worried about having been exposed to HIV, you should go to your GP/Sexual Health Clinic immediately. A person can take HIV medications immediately after being exposed to decrease their chances of becoming positive – similar to the Plan B pill for pregnancy.

It is called PEP (or post exposure prophylaxis.) You can find out more here.

- I am trans and worried I will be treated differently at my sexual health appointment.

If you are transgender, accessing health services can sometimes be difficult or daunting. You may have had negative experiences in the past or have heard that some NHS services are not trans-inclusive.

However, Sexual health services & the NHS are committed to ensuring that all their service users feel welcome and if they do not or you feel discriminated, you are well within your right to complain – this can be done online if you don’t feel comfortable.

- I have a vulva and only have sex with others who have vulvas. do I need to worry about STIs?

Yes. Nobody is immune to STIs.

Make sure you use barrier methods (info above) and get regular tests – every 6 months or every time you’ve had unprotected sex.

- If I take prep do I still need to use condoms?

Yes. PrEP helps you stay protected against HIV but you still need to be protected against other STIs.

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